Open Letter Wednesday

Dear precious Baby Boy,

I've gotta just come right out and say this: 4:41 am is not (nor has it ever been--unless you're getting up this early to catch a flight somewhere exotic and awesome) an appropriate time to wake up in the morning*. 4:41 am falls into more of a "middle-of-the-night-wake-up-but-I-can-be-soothed-back-to-sleep," in my book, instead of a "woo hoo! Let's start our day!" kind-of-thing. And also, when you try to wake up that early, you sound the cat alarm, which leads the cats to believe that it's an acceptable time to wake up...which means "breakfast! Now!" time for them. You're on my list today, young man.

Love always,
Mama


Dear weekend at the beach,

Hurry and get here please.

Love,
Me

Dear Flies,

You are the most annoying creatures on the planet. Get out of my house. Get off of our food. Quit buzzing my head at night. I have a fly swatter and I know how to use it. I might take pity on roaches and spiders and calmly release them back outside, but you? I take no pity. You're gross and you've worn out your welcome here. Now, get back outside to our compost pile and do your work.

Buzz off,
Me

Dear Old Navy,

That was super-awesome how, last week, you stuck a flyer in my shopping bag, after I'd checked out, stating that the very next day, everything in the store was going to be 30% off. You're very lucky that I had an impatient toddler with me who kept me from staying a little longer to go through the return process on my just-purchased items, so that I could come back the next day to save a buck or two. Thanks, however, for the cute new sundresses though. They were totally worth paying 30% more than the next guy, just so that they could sit in my closet (since I've had zero opportunity to wear anything cute lately).

Yours truly,
J

Dear person on the treadmill next to me at the gym,

Here's the thing, sweetie: if you'd lower that crazy incline a tad and slow down the speed, but--here's the kicker--LET GO OF THE DAMN MACHINE (i.e. quit draping yourself over the top and holding on for dear, honking life) you'd be doing your body a big favor. I know, I know. The treadmill is telling you that you've burned 1,400 calories in 30 minutes, but the thing is, you're cheating by hanging on like that and you've likely burned less than 100 calories. I'm no personal trainer or anything, but you're not doing it right.

Thanks,
Me

*Dear Paw Paw & Granny,

If, however, you two were kind enough to keep the kids while Kevin and I enjoy an exotic vacation this Summer, I'm more than positive that Jack would not ever, ever wake up that early, while in your care. I'm sure of it. Please don't be scared.

Love,
Me

In other news, we began our kitchen remodel over the weekend. I can already see the finished product in my head and it's going to be great! Maybe, if I can recover from the early morning that I had, I'll post some pictures soon. Also, Anna had her first baseball game over the weekend. Pictures of that to come as well.